How Do I Handle Conflict?
- Jerod Williams
- Jun 18
- 2 min read
Short Answer: You don’t, EVER.
As a general disclaimer, if she is a healthy person (you are as well especially if you’re reading this and follow me) and not a Looney Tune, this is how you resolve conflict with your lady.
Most importantly, what causes such spectacles?
Simplified: You are failing in your masculinity by ceasing to LEAD, DATE, and LISTEN. This is why she becomes angry and ‘bitchy.’ She is SCARED and does not feel SAFE anymore to relax into her natural essence, which is femininity. You stopped being the guy she became accustomed to. She needs him once again and ALWAYS.
‘Womanese’ is indeed a language and to be successful with the lady you desire, you must learn it. Women are emotional, it’s purely a part of them being feminine. What is the cornerstone of masculinity? SELF-CONTROL. As a man, you are able to apply logic and reasoning for we are geared to be natural problem solvers.
DO NOT INJECT YOUR EGO INTO HER CHALLENGES.
Here is where most guys fail:
DO NOT solve her problems for her. Women think differently, through their emotions and come to conclusions after expressing themselves openly. IT IS YOUR DUTY TO ALLOW FOR THIS. You must allow her to talk, give voice to her concerns, and express herself as openly as possible. Women bond through their ears. You have two ears and one mouth. UTILIZE THEM ACCORDINGLY. This means you ask, then PROACTIVELY listen. Listen without ANY intent to respond. Say things like, “I see…” “So what you’re saying is…” “And what else?”
If it’s something she’s having trouble with and it’s very important to her (i.e., family matters, or work issues) KEEP ASKING QUESTIONS. Guide her to her own answers. Ask how she feels about the situation, potential decisions, and the like. Again, ALLOW her to come to her OWN conclusions. Not you.
This is critical. In any romantic relationship, the key factor for long term success is communication: openly and honestly. This is achieved by allowing her to talk about anything and everything. And guess what? When she really cares about you, she’ll trust you. That is paramount for a woman’s love. Thus, she respects you. She will want to share EVERYTHING. GREEN FLAG.
After she’s done venting, you’ll visibly witness her melting back into her feminine presence before she was upset. She’ll want to be close and held by you. ALWAYS judge her actions, not words.
This is essentially how you are apologizing to your lady. You pushed her out of her comfortability with you by disallowing her femininity. It’s YOUR job to guide her back.